Author: Aisha Aslam
If mealtimes in your house feel more like a battleground than a bonding experience, you are not alone. From the toddler who survives on nothing but goldfish crackers to the child who gags at the sight of a new vegetable, feeding issues are one of the most common and stressful challenges parents face.
It’s easy to feel like a short-order cook, a negotiator, and a failure all at once. But take a deep breath. Feeding challenges are rarely about your parenting, and they are almost always something you can work through with patience and the right strategies.
Let’s explore the common types of feeding issues, their potential causes, and a practical roadmap to bring peace back to your table.
Is It Just Picky Eating, or Something More?
Most children go through phases of fear of new foods, especially between ages 2 and 5. This is a normal part of development. However, when feeding problems significantly impact a child’s growth, health, or family functioning, it may be a more significant issue.
Common Types of Feeding Challenges:
1. Picky/Restrictive Eating: This is the most common issue. A child may have a very limited list of accepted foods (often beige, crunchy, or specific brands), refuse entire food groups, or suddenly reject foods they once loved.
2. Oral Motor Delays: The problem isn’t the food itself, but the child’s ability to manage it. They may have difficulty chewing, moving food around in their mouth, or swallowing safely, leading to coughing, gagging, or pocketing food in their cheeks.
3. Sensory Aversions: For some children, the sensory properties of food the smell, texture, color, or temperature, are overwhelming. A lumpy food like mashed potatoes might feel as unpleasant as slime. This is very common in children with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) but can affect any child.
4. Medical/Physical Issues: Underlying conditions like GERD (acid reflux), food allergies, constipation, or tongue-tie can make eating painful or uncomfortable, leading a child to refuse food.
5. Behavioral Power Struggles: Mealtime becomes a control battle. A child learns that refusing food is a powerful way to get attention or assert their independence.
Try Today
Here are actionable strategies to help your child build a healthier relationship with food.
1. Establish a Routine Children thrive on predictability. Offer three meals and 2-3 scheduled snacks at about the same time each day. This prevents all-day grazing, which ruins appetites, and helps children arrive at the table hungry and ready to eat.
2. Make Food Fun &Non-Pressure
Pressure is the enemy of adventurous eating. Instead of forcing, bribing, or begging, focus on exposure.
- Play with Your Food: Let them build with carrot sticks or make a face out of peas. Touch it, smell it, and describe it without the expectation of eating it.
- Use "Food Chaining": Make tiny, gradual changes to accepted foods. If they only eat one brand of plain pasta, try a different shape of the same brand. Then, try a very similar brand. Later, add a tiny dot of butter or sprinkle of a familiar cheese.
- Involve Them: Take them grocery shopping and let them pick out a new fruit or vegetable. Involve them in age-appropriate cooking tasks like washing, tearing lettuce, or stirring. A child who has helped cook is far more likely to try the result.
3. Manage Your Expectations (and Your Anxiety)
- It Can Take 10-20 Exposures: A child may need to see a new food on their plate over a dozen times before they feel comfortable tasting it. Don't give up after two tries!
- Stay Neutral: Keep your facial expressions and tone neutral, whether they try a new food or refuse everything. A simple "thank you for sitting with us" goes a long way.
- Model, Model, Model: Eat the same foods you want your child to eat. Let them see you enjoying a variety of flavors and textures. You are their most powerful teacher.
4. Deconstruct Meals
Sensory-sensitive children often dislike when foods are mixed together. Serve "deconstructed" meals. Instead of a casserole, serve the components separately: ground meat, shredded cheese, pasta, and a side of sauce. This gives them a sense of control.
You Don't Have to Do It Alone: The Power of Personalised Support
While the strategies above are a great starting point, every child is unique. What works for one may not work for another, and navigating this journey can feel isolating.
This is where professional guidance makes all the difference. At Floreo, we understand that feeding issues are complex and deeply personal. That’s why we provide a personalised plan and dedicated parent support to help you overcome feeding issues in your child.
Our approach includes:
- Individualised Assessment: We take the time to understand the root causes of your child's challenges, whether they're based in sensory aversions, oral motor skills, or behavioral patterns.
- Tailored Strategies: We create a step-by-step plan that fits your child's specific needs and your family's routines, moving at a pace that is comfortable for everyone.
- Empowering Parent Coaching: We equip you with the tools, knowledge, and confidence to implement strategies consistently at home, turning mealtimes from a source of stress into an opportunity for connection and progress.
When to Seek Professional Help
While most picky eating phases pass, it’s crucial to know when to call in the experts.Consult your pediatrician and seek a referral to a specialist if your child:
- Is not gaining weight or is losing weight.
- Has significantly fewer than 5-10 accepted foods.
- Gags, vomits, or chokes regularly during meals.
- Has difficulty chewing or swallowing, or consistently pockets food.
- Has extreme emotional outbursts or anxiety around food.
- You suspect an underlying medical issue like reflux or an allergy.
The right team of professionals can include:
- A Pediatrician: To rule out medical causes.
- A Pediatric Registered Dietitian (RD): To ensure nutritional needs are met.
- A Speech-Language Pathologist (SLP): To address oral motor and swallowing
- An Occupational Therapist (OT): To address sensory processing challenges.
You Are Not Alone on This Journey
Overcoming feeding issues is a marathon, not a sprint. There will be good days and hard days. The goal is not a "perfect eater" but a child who has a positive, healthy relationship with food and can listen to their body.
Be kind to yourself. By providing structure, removing pressure, and seeking help when needed—whether through a dedicated program like Floreo or other specialist support—you are laying the foundation for a lifetime of healthy eating habits. Tonight, take one small step. Maybe it’s serving a new food alongside a favorite without any comment. You’ve got this.